“I am Sorry” – The Three Hardest Words to Say - Desmond Tutu

Answer the following contextual questions in the given pattern.

a. Identify the essay and name the author of the given lines.

b. Discuss the context of the lines and appreciate them critically in about 75 words.

1. If I dwell on those memories, I can feel myself wanting to hurt my father back, in the same ways he hurt my mother.

Essay: I am Sorry” – The Three Hardest Words to Say

Author: Desmond Tutu

b. Context

These lines are from the essay where Desmond Tutu shares a painful childhood memory. He recalls how his father treated his mother badly. While remembering these events, he reflects on the strong emotions they created in him.

Explanation

Tutu says that when he thinks deeply about those memories, he feels anger and a desire for revenge. He even feels like hurting his father in the same way his father hurt his mother. This shows how painful experiences can create negative feelings in a person.

Critical Appreciation

These lines are honest and emotional. Tutu openly shares his inner struggle, which makes the writing powerful. The line shows how hurt can lead to anger and revenge. At the same time, it prepares the reader for the lesson of forgiveness. The tone is serious and thought-provoking.

2. Forgiveness, in other words, is the best form of self-interest.

Essay: “I am Sorry” – The Three Hardest Words to Say

Author: Desmond Tutu

b. Context

These lines appear in the essay when Desmond Tutu explains the importance of forgiveness. After sharing his painful experiences and feelings of anger, he reflects on how holding on to hatred can harm a person. In this context, he highlights the value of forgiving others.

Explanation

Tutu means that forgiveness is not just good for others, but also for ourselves. When we forgive, we free ourselves from anger, pain, and bitterness. It helps us feel peaceful and happy. So, forgiveness works in our own interest.

Critical Appreciation

This line is simple but very meaningful. It presents forgiveness in a practical way, not just as a moral duty. The idea is clear and easy to understand. Tutu’s message is positive and inspiring. It encourages readers to choose peace over anger, making the line powerful and universal.

3. We know that even the things they did wrong were opportunities for us to teach them to be citizens of the world.

a. Essay: “I am Sorry” – The Three Hardest Words to Say

Author: Desmond Tutu

b. Context

These lines appear in the essay when Desmond Tutu speaks about dealing with people who have done wrong. He reflects on how negative actions can be handled in a positive and meaningful way. Instead of focusing only on punishment, he suggests a better approach.

Explanation

Tutu means that when people make mistakes, it should be seen as a chance to guide and teach them. Their wrong actions can help them learn how to behave better and become responsible members of society. It is about correcting with understanding, not just blaming.

Critical Appreciation

This line gives a positive and hopeful message. It shows Tutu’s belief in learning and growth. The idea is simple but powerful—it turns mistakes into opportunities. His tone is wise and encouraging. It promotes kindness, patience, and a better way of building a good society.

4. No one is born a liar or a rapist or a terrorist. No one is born full of hatred.

Essay: “I am Sorry” – The Three Hardest Words to Say

Author: Desmond Tutu

Context

These lines appear in the essay when Desmond Tutu explains the nature of human behaviour. He argues that people are not born with negative qualities like hatred or violence. Instead, such behaviours develop due to experiences, environment, and upbringing.

Explanation

Tutu means that no person is born bad. Qualities like lying, violence, or hatred are learned over time. Society, family, and situations influence a person’s actions. This suggests that people can also change if they are guided properly.

Critical Appreciation

This line is powerful and thought-provoking. It presents a hopeful view of humanity. Tutu uses simple and direct language to make a strong point. The idea encourages understanding and compassion instead of judgment. It supports the theme of forgiveness and reform, making the message inspiring and meaningful.

Answer the following questions in about 150 words each

1. Desmond Tutu considers forgiveness the highest form of self-interest. Discuss this idea in the light of his views expressed in the lesson I Am Sorry : The Three Hardest Words to Say.

Desmond Tutu says that forgiveness helps the person who forgives. When we keep anger and hatred in our heart, we feel pain and stress. It does not give us peace. But when we forgive, we feel light and calm inside.

In the lesson, Tutu shares his own painful childhood. He saw his father hurting his mother, and he felt angry. He even wanted to hurt his father back. But later, he understood that holding on to anger would only harm him.

So, he chose forgiveness. He explains that forgiveness is good for our own happiness. It helps us move forward in life. That is why he calls it the best form of self-interest. It is not just for others—it is for our own peace and well-being.

2. Apologizing is a sign of strength, not weakness. How does the lesson I am Sorry justify the statement.

In the lesson, Desmond Tutu shows that saying “I am sorry” needs courage. Many people think that apologizing makes them look weak. But Tutu says it is actually a sign of strength.

To say sorry, a person must accept their mistake. This is not easy. It needs honesty and bravery. A weak person may hide their mistake or blame others. But a strong person accepts the truth and tries to correct it.

Tutu also explains that apologizing helps to heal relationships. It brings peace and understanding between people. It shows respect and kindness.

So, apologizing is not a weakness. It shows that a person is mature, responsible, and strong enough to do the right thing.

3. Do you think Desmond Tutu forgave his father ? If yes, what thoughts led him to forgive his father ?

Yes, Desmond Tutu forgave his father. In the lesson, he shares that he felt angry when he saw his father hurt his mother. He even wanted to take revenge.

But later, he changed his thinking. He understood that his father was not born bad. People become like that because of their life and experiences. This thought helped him feel less anger.

Tutu also believed that holding on to hatred would hurt him more. He wanted peace in his heart. So, he chose to forgive his father.

His decision shows maturity and kindness. It also matches his belief that forgiveness is important for our own happiness. Through forgiveness, he was able to let go of pain and live peacefully.